Are you looking to turn your life story into a book? Then, we’ll teach you how to start writing a book about your life in this article!
Whether you’ve lived through quiet transformations, deep personal struggles, or wild adventures, your story matters, and the world is waiting to read from you.
While we provided a quick insight here, getting started can be a little overwhelming.
Thus, we’ve decided to take a step-by-step approach to help you start writing your life story with examples that would spark your ideas.
Fasten your seat belt as usual!
How to Start Writing a Book About Your Life
Here are 7 simple steps to get you started on how you can start writing a book about your life:
1. Decide the Exact Story you Want to Tell
When people say, “I want to write a book about my life,” the first instinct is usually to start at the childhood—the beginning—and move to the present.
But think for a moment, won’t that be too overwhelming? Yes, that’s definitely going to be.
Let’s be real here: Most people who will be reading your autobiography don’t want to read it completely. What they want is a story with a clear purpose.
To help you understand the exact story you want to share, examine:
1. Theme
As you start on the road on how to start writing a book about your life, the first thing to focus on is your theme.
Focus on just a central theme, message, or transformation you desire to share.
Your life is an amazing collection of stories and the best idea is to pick just the best that does represent your journey—the exact one to help your readers explore.
To find out, ask yourself:
- What major experience or event changed me?
- What do I desire my reader to feel or learn at the end?
- Why do I feel the urge to share the story?
Some Possible Themes to Explore:
Here are some examples of real, excellent life themes that could anchor your book:
- Resilience through illness: This can really be about how you battled a chronic condition and found strength.
- Starting over after a great loss: Death, divorce, or a career collapse can be a major spotlight.
- Healing childhood trauma: A journey from pain to peace and empowerment.
- Immigration and identity: This is about your journey of adapting and searching for where you truly belong.
- Faith and doubt: This is about how your beliefs were reshaped and challenged.
- Personal reinvention: This is also your life moving from burnout to breakthrough, or maybe a “who I used to be vs. who I am now.”
2. Focused Story Example
Now, you can even twist it a little bit.
- Instead of: “My whole life—from childhood to adulthood.”
- Try: “How I reclaim my life after the death of a loved one, and found peace again” or “The lessons I learned raising a child with Adhd.”
What did you notice?
The two examples sounded like a true life book.
They tell readers things they will explore when reading it. And what’s more? It helps you focus on what really matters.
3. Why Focus Matters
When you focus, your story will:
- Keep your writing more compelling
- Make it easier to know what to add and what to cut out.
- Help readers connect and engage emotionally.
- Enhances the chances that readers will read your book from start to finish.
Challenge Yourself:
You want to write a book, but what’s your theme? Find out, examine if it’s direct, and find out what readers stand to gain.
The moment you can get that, you are set.
2. Pick a Starting Point That Grabs Readers’ Attention
Most readers do not care about your country or place of birth or what your bedroom appears like.
Even if some people care, it won’t be right away.
Their goal is to get hooked—they want you to pull them into the scene where it’s happening.
1. Where You Shouldn’t Start
Don’t start at the very beginning (Unless It’s Wild).
If your birth involved a miracle, tornado, or an international scandal, add it.
However, if it doesn’t, skip it. Move straight into moments that are packed with tension, emotion, or turning-point energy.
Therefore, ask yourself:
- Where are the lowest points in my story?
- When did everything change?
- When was I aware that things wouldn’t be the same?
Know the answer to this? It’s exactly where your book should start.
It’s not just when life was normal. It’s when it’s unpredictable, messy, or meaningful.
2. Think Cinematically
You should write in a way that makes your reader feel like they are in a movie scene.
Let them feel your heartbeat, hear the voices, smell the aroma, or tastes the meal.
- Instead of this: “I was born in a small town in 1973.”
- Try this: “I was 31, drenched in the rain, staring at the wreckage of what used to be my lovely house. It was that moment I knew everything had to change.”
The second one gives feelings.
Why will this always work? Because you started with a powerful moment. And powerful moments always:
- Instantly pulls readers in
- Creates curiosity—“What happened? What’s next?”
- Gives your book momentum from the very first page.
- Establishes the tone for the emotional journey ahead
So, make it a goal to start with:
- A moment of heartbreak (A breakup, getting bad news, a loss)
- A personal crisis (Quitting your job, walking out of a courtroom, leaving home)
- A breakthrough (A deep realization, an unexpected decision, and act of courage)
- An emotional or physical setting that captures your state of mind.
Examples:
- “The phone rang at 3:17 a.m., and I already knew it was going to be bad news.”
- “Everyone else was singing happy birthday, and I was thinking how I ended up so alone.”
These moments make people want to keep reading.
Challenge Yourself:
Write a paragraph describing a scene from your story’s most emotional or intense moment.
Remember to use your five senses—what you hear, see, smell, touch, or taste.
You can add the background details later.
3. Make a Rough Outline
At this stage, you should know what your story is all about.
Then, the next thing is to figure out how you will be telling your story.
Therefore, having an incredibly rough outline is key!
A rough outline is a map and not a prison. You won’t be locking yourself into anything.
Instead, you are simply giving your brain a path to follow, so you won’t have to stare at a blank page confused about where to start.
Here are excellent ways to have it structured:
1. Structure It Like a Movie
Your life story might not be fiction, but you can still make it feel like a compelling movie.
Most excellent stories follow a basic structure:
- A normal event
- Something breaks
- It gets worse
- Something shifts
- Then, a new version of you emerges
Then, apply this structure to your life.
2. A Simple Outline Example
Here are tips to keep in mind:
1. The Breakdown: When the life you knew fell off.
Example: I lost my money after my business failed. I was clueless and didn’t know what was next, but I knew nothing would ever be the same.
2. Rock Bottom: The pain. The lowest point. The isolation.
Example: “I was laying in my car, running from friends, and couldn’t find a way out.”
3. The Spark: This is when something or someone alters your direction.
Example: “A moment of clarity. A book that altered your perspective.”
4. The Climb: The slow, messy, hopeful journey upward.
Example: “Getting your cherished job again, rebuilding trust with your spouse, learning new skills—failing and trying again.”
5. The Lesson: The lessons you learned and how you live now.
Example: “I’m not the person I was—and I’m grateful. This is the lesson I want people to know about surviving and thriving.
Why Outlining Helps
- Outlining helps greatly in keeping you from being overwhelmed. It helps you to work on a project one at a time.
- Makes the story easier to follow. You know where things start, rise, fall, and resolve.
- Helps with editing later. You’ll find a structure you can tweak instead of trying to wrangle a giant blob of memories.
Your Outline Doesn’t Need to Be Fancy
You can write it as bullet points, a timeline, sticky notes, or even voice memos.
Whatever helps you visualize the flow.
Example Bullet Outline:
- Chapter 1: Picking up the resignation letter
- Chapter 2: Calling my dad from a gas station crying
- Chapter 3: Sam and I met at the support group
- Chapter 4: Getting my first freelance client
- Chapter 5: Launching my business
- Chapter 6: My encounter with fear, failure, and starting anew.
Challenge Yourself:
Write 5 major chapters in your story. Don’t worry about the order—just pen down the moments.
Then ask: “What event happened before this? What happened after?”
4. Write the Way You Talk
You can make things a lot easier for yourself here: Consult with a writing agency.
Well, you can do the writing yourself—whatever rocks your boat. But this is something you should keep in mind:
Don’t write or sound like a writer.
Writers favor big words, flowery sentences, or poetic descriptions.
But the real deal is this: Your personal story shouldn’t sound like that. It doesn’t have to be fancy.
The goal is to simply sound like you.
Write on the page and let the reader feel like they are reading from a friend.
How would you sound to a friend you are sharing some moments of your life with?
That’s the tone that is required from you.
It has to be personal, comfortable, and honest!
After all, you aren’t trying to impress anyone. Your goal is only to connect with your reader—heart to heart.
This type of writing feels better, faster, and easier—in fact, more powerful.
Here are what you can do:
1. Employ Real Language, Real Emotion
Readers wouldn’t be overly concerned about your perfect grammar.
They would only fall in love with the truth.
They look forward to your vulnerability, your flawed, beautiful, and messy emotional stuff—things that make us human.
Example:
“I felt like I wouldn’t breathe again. Like the world was melting down and I was just standing there, pretending to be okay.”
This no doubt makes you feel something. And that’s the main goal—to make readers feel.
2. Let Your Personality Shine
Are you naturally funny? Let your humor come through.
If you’re serious and raw, be that.
Don’t try to imitate someone else’s sound or sound writerly—be you!
Your natural voice is your selling point if you don’t know.
Examples of voice:
“I had zero idea what I was doing. Nada. But I pretended I did because… well, we move.”
“It wasn’t pretty. I cried into my cereal. Just twice.”
“I said I was fine, but inside I was burning. And honestly, that was my default mode at those moments.”
Why This Works
- It’s relatable: Your readers can see themselves in your words.
- It builds trust: It makes your readers believe you.
- It creates intimacy: It fosters a deep, late-night talk.
You’re not just penning a book. You’re creating a connection.
Challenge Yourself:
Read your draft out loud. If it sounds stiff or awkward, rewrite it like you’d say it.
But if it sounds like something you’d express to a friend, you’re on the right track.
Remember:
Even if you hire a professional writer, remember to tell them to keep your tone in mind so you can make your story powerful.
Your story needs to be honest, clear, and just you.
5. Add Details That Bring Moments to Life
You may know how something felt exactly.
But if your readers are unable to picture it, they won’t feel it the way you did.
In that way, details come in from there.
You aim to show and not just to inform:
1. Show the Scene
Your readers must hear, see, feel, and even smell what’s happening.
Use the five senses. Use body language. Use setting and atmosphere.
Example:
“My palms were sweaty, and I could hear my heartbeat racing. I didn’t stop adjusting my tie, even though it was already straight. When I was called, I felt like I was walking in a courtroom, not even in a job interview.”
2. Add More Life to Your Scenes
Ask yourself:
- What did I see? What people, colors, or surroundings stood out?
- What did I really feel in my body?
- What did the place sound like? Was it muffled? Was it silent? Loud?
- Was there a smell? (Fresh coffee, paint, hospital disinfectant?)
- How did my body react? (Tight chest, shaking hands, or racing thoughts?)
Challenge Yourself
Pick one sentence from your story, relate a feeling, and rewrite it to express it.
6. Write in Small Sessions
You don’t have to write your story all at once.
In fact, sitting down and “cranking out a book” in one weekend is one of the quickest ways to lose motivation, burn out, and walk away from your story altogether.
So what’s the key?
Small, Consistent Steps.
- Adopt a Pomodoro technique for writers here.
- Set a timer for just 20 to 30 minutes. That’s it.
No pressure. Just write whatever comes to mind about a moment, chapter, or memory.
If you write a paragraph, great.
If you write a page, awesome.
If you just sit and brainstorm thoughts, that works too.
What matters is showing up. The habit builds the book.
If you write a page per day, you’ve 365 pages. That’s awesome. So, daily, make progress.
Pro Tip: Use a Journal or Notes App
Keep Notes handy, when a thought pops out, note them.
Memories don’t wait for writing time—while you’re in the shower, cooking, walking the dog, cooking, or lying in bed at 5 a.m.
Be ready.
7. Don’t Worry About Perfection (Yet)
On your first try, you won’t get everything perfect!
But at The Exquisite Writers, here’s a secret we know:
The first draft wouldn’t always be the final story—it’s just you starting the journey.
The foundation is always the emotional, messy, and disorganized draft.
Allow Yourself to Be Imperfect
Your first draft wouldn’t need to impress anyone. It doesn’t need perfect grammar or beautiful sentences. It just needs a heart.
Your main job is to start the story out of your head and put it onto the page.
You can shape, polish, and fine-tune it later.
And again, expect the same from any professional writer you are consulting.
Keep in mind that whatever they send first is the draft.
You’ll revise Later—And That’s a Good Thing
Final Thoughts
Yeah, this is how you can write a book about your life with great examples!
You don’t need to be famous to write a memoir.
You just need a real story—and trust me, you have it.
Want help getting started? Consult with The Exquisite Writers today!
You can drop a comment or message if you want more tips or feedback!